Best Chat Up Lines

[markdavid]

From both sides Please?

[Chr15]

Get your coat, you've pulled...

[KrisB]

I've lost my virginity... can i have yours please?

[chrisvtr1989]

is your second name Gillette..... cos your the best a man can get

[smiith]

Get your gash out.

[Jazz]

OhHaiMyNameIsMarkDavidAndILikeYourFish. ;)

lol

[B+B]

I've got a 7 inch tongue and I can breathe through my ears, intrested?

[VtrBhoy]

I might not be Fred Flintstone but i'll make your bedrock

or

Do you sleep on your stomach? Well is it ok if i do?:wink:

[Ashleyp]

if you and me were squirrels, id store my nuts in your hole

[Crunkers]

Can you smell this and tell me if its chloroform...

[PSPDan]

Fancy a bum?

[ShockZy]

haha balls of steel!

[Chr15]

if you and me were squirrels, id store my nuts in your hole

Nicole was easy...

I dont use chat up lines, I use Rohypnol

[markdavid]

Welcome to the club,first drink is on the house...

[Danr]

Chat up lines rarely work.

[Marky_C]

Ya'alrite luv!

[saxovtrstevie]

get your stinking rat out

[Liamm]

Ya'alrite luv!

that is the maker or breaker of the night :P

[markdavid]

You can save money on make-up,look great though the bottom of my empty pint glass,and all my mates have left.

[markdavid]

O,hand,have not seen you for ages ry still on top shelf doll?

[Marky_C]

that is the maker or breaker of the night :P

It's abit of Yorkshire charm the ladies love it!
That's a lie!

[Mr_X]

Get your coat, you've pulled...

lol, classic

All I say is "Nice Shoes"

[Jazz]

You're foaming at the lips, the ones between your hips.

[Danr]

You're foaming at the lips, the ones between your hips.

Bloody rabies...

[Liam]

If I can guess the first 5 digits of your phone number, can I have the rest?
Then you just say your local area code and hope they're from your area ;)

[CurtSD]

If I can guess the first 5 digits of your phone number, can I have the rest?
Then you just say your local area code and hope they're from your area ;)

Brilliant lol

[Liam]

Repost. Fail.

[LouisUK]

If I can guess the first 5 digits of your phone number, can I have the rest?
Then you just say your local area code and hope they're from your area ;)

lol thats a good en.

Is you hot or am I coming down with something?

[Smurphious]

Would you hold it against me if I said you have a nice body?

Nice legs, what time do they open?

You've got eyes like spanners, They just made my nuts tighten!

Whilst very drunk once a girl I'd been chatting up earlier that evening was giving me some grief from for talking to her breasts. When she finished asking the ear bashing and told me to look her in the eye all I could say was 'I've made my choice' It didn't end well for us!

[Rogue_Shadow]

Bloody rabies...

:clapping: ha ha!

[Bound]

Hi, I know markdavid.

[Liam_LFC_VTR]

Wanna go outside?

[scot-ish]

Hi, I know markdavid.

that would work on me lol

[shinner_vtr]

my place or yours ?

[markdavid]

Outside the Club at the end of no pull,You are the best girl on the floor...

[Jaytee]

Surprise Sex!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*Cosh*

[Liam_LFC_VTR]

Outside the Club at the end of no pull,You are the best girl on the floor...

Your posts were kinda funny at the start. Now they're not.

[Mike-VTR]

OhHaiMyNameIsMarkDavidAndILikeYourFish. ;)

lol

haha fucking LEG-END

if i had room in my sig thisa would go straight in there

[markdavid]

Get out that COMA,its been longer than 2-days-LEO the Lion,seen you love larger,You love fat girls.Have you got a sat-navey to find work.That is a chat up line.One mate under a bet got loads of cards made with his no. on it and handed it to every women in the pub,and sat on every table saying why you with him,pub fell apart and a fast run to the car...

[PSPDan]

Get out that COMA,its been longer than 2-days-LEO the Lion,seen you love larger,You love fat girls.Have you got a sat-navey to find work.That is a chat up line.One mate under a bet got loads of cards made with his no. on it and handed it to every women in the pub,and sat on every table saying why you with him,pub fell apart and a fast run to the car...

Thanks mate might have to use that :y:

[de51_Hodgey]

dont be nasty show us your pasty
and
dont be shy show us your pie

[djmartin]

dont be nasty show us your pasty
and
dont be shy show us your pie

wtf! lol sounds like something which would be said on a episode of shooting star hahaha.

the dove from above
the fanny from your granny lol.

I dont use chat up lines I just act bad. women love a bad boy :P

[Liam_LFC_VTR]

http://www.funnyforumpics.com/forums/Tits-Or-GTFO/1/a121768a2ccc8ac9a4de58265cb94382.jpg

Can result in a slap if it goes wrong tbh.

[nicole_]

Nicole was easy...

I dont use chat up lines, I use Rohypnol

well your pretty rude :S

[Chr15]

:(

Im sorry.

[Mike-VTR]

excuse me miss, does this taste like rohypnol to you?

if that fails, you say:

look come on, im on first name terms with mark,david.

[enthrone]

grab your coat, i've got a knife.

[Danr]

"stop screaming, stop screaming, don't make this rape become a murder"

[farmerchris]

will you have sex with me?
she replies: no
will you lay down while i have sex with you?

[PSPDan]

"stop screaming, stop screaming, don't make this rape become a murder"

:clapping:

[markdavid]

He is prowing car care,liam is,still born again but whot. we all now Women love money best.

[Dave89]

I play rugby, can i show you my tackle?

[danwilliams9]

corrrr u aint sweating that uch for a fat bird !!

[Liamm]

corrrr u aint sweating that uch for a fat bird !!


:clapping: hahahaa!

[Danr]

Can I just say last night I actually used the line... "Lets go upstairs and you can get your knickers off."

Win.

[PSPDan]

Can I just say last night I actually used the line... "Lets go upstairs and you can get your knickers off."

Win.

You are an inspiration to us all Danr. :hug:

[J222JRA]

show me where you piss from!

[Danr]

You are an inspiration to us all Danr. :hug:

Actually worked. Cock feels like it's going to fall off right now..... may be something to do with the chlamydia but ftw!

[PSPDan]

Actually worked. Cock feels like it's going to fall off right now..... may be something to do with the chlamydia but ftw!

:fcuk::fcuk::fcuk:

[fastswat4949]

That chair looks a bit soft. Do you want something harder to sit on?

[markdavid]

whot time of the day do like it best,all the time is a good answer,some do ...

[OLLYVTS]

Heres 20p phone your mum and tell her you wont be home tonight.

[djmartin]

you ask: do you like jewlery?
women replies: YES
you reply: well suck on my cock its a right jem!

[TU-Tuning]

Get your coat, Ive got a knife

[djmartin]

Get your coat, Ive got a knife

FAIL.

page 3 post 47 have a look ben lols

[TU-Tuning]

dagnammit lol

[Rogue_Shadow]

Its not rape is you shout surprise first


SURPRISE!

[Mike-VTR]

show me where you piss from!

Nice James, subtle.

[LeeBBH]

Get in the Van.

[bald24]

Is that dress felt? Would you like it to be?

I think my heart just lagged.

Baby, you overclock my processor.

I didn't bring my library card, but can I check you out?

[J222JRA]

Nice James, subtle.

Yeap thats me hahahahaha

to be fair though i have never used this line, use with caution

[markdavid]

Its raining,like a lift home

[stormin]

Is that a mirror in your pants?
Cause I can see myself in them

is your dad a dimond theif?
Cause he stole two gems and put them in your eyes.

Baby, somebody better call God, cuz he's missing an angel!

Is that a keg in your pants? Because I'd love to tap that ass.

[Rogue_Shadow]

I didn't bring my library card, but can I check you out?

:y: score

[markdavid]

Give us ago on your bike.

[Mike-VTR]

well atleast i understood the whoole of that sentence, however, it was terribad.

[Gary-VTR]

Give us ago on your bike.

LOLL Wtf

[Cammy]

I know.. lets play army, ill lie down, and you blow the fuck outa me!

[James106]

Give us ago on your bike.

that worked on me mate, :homme:

[Bound]

Topical;

http://rkellyncars.ytmnd.com/

[markdavid]

In the old Ferar,red and rusty a bit magnum style , ride for a Ride,they only wanted to go in the old reck,it was a bit tatty ,sold it for 37g on a PX,thank god....

[P90PTS]

In the old Ferar,red and rusty a bit magnum style , ride for a Ride,they only wanted to go in the old reck,it was a bit tatty ,sold it for 37g on a PX,thank god....

Are you actually a fucking retard? This makes as much sense as tits on a fish

[djmartin]

dagnammit lol

lols :P

[bullit]

if they g0 wr0ng

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?

Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Really? I heard it was because everyone there calls you a fat slut.




Man: Would you like to dance?

Woman: I'd rather eat glass.

Man: I think you mis-heard me. I said you look fat in those pants



Man: You're pretty

Woman: Piss off.

Man: Don't interrupt, You're pretty... ugly, you fat bitch.

[Liam_LFC_VTR]

John_G is the master of chat up lines iirc.

[vtr_dan]

Want smashing :P

[Ryyy]

Im pissing muyself here haha, mostlyy at MarkDavid hahahahaha

[KrisB]

Wow! When i left this morning the thread like 4 posts!

[D--R--E--W]

if you were a door i'd bang you all night

fancy your dinner?

kite oot ya rat!!

[Cov_Rob]

Does this cloth smell like chloroform

[JamesR]

> Flash ya gash

> Get ya rat out

> Show us ya muff

Normally ends with a slap, or a funny luck.

[dannyboy2005]

Nicole was easy...

I dont use chat up lines, I use Rohypnol

LMAO :y: