Quotes of the century....

[VTHall]

If you know any stupid/thick quotes, put them on here...

Taken from fabio cappello:
"Howcum you lost today fabio, any reasons?"
'I think we lost becuase we didnt win' LMAO!

[savo]

Fabio just talks sometimes...doesn't even think what he's saying, he just opens his mouth and sound comes out lol.

Some of these have to be in the line up for quote of the century...they're from Gordon Strachan.

After the game the Poland international, nicknamed the 'Holy Goalie' by the Celtic fans, took his goalkeeping shirt off to show a t-shirt with a picture of the Pope and accompanying slogan.
But Strachan joked: "He's not a bad lad, to be fair (the Pope).
"If it was 'God bless Myra Hindley', I might have a problem."

Reporter: Gordon, you must be delighted with that result?
Strachan: You're spot on! You can read me like a book.

Reporter: Gordon, Do you think James Beattie deserves to be in the England squad?
Strachan: I don't care, I'm Scottish.

Reporter: Is that your best start to a season?
Strachan: Well I've still got a job so it's far better than the Coventry one, that's for sure.

Reporter: Gordon, what will you take from today?
Strachan: I've got more important things to think about. I've got a yoghurt
to finish, the expiry date is today.

Reporter: What is your impression of Jermaine Pennant?
Strachan: I don't do impressions.

Reporter: So Gordon, any changes then ?
Strachan: Naw, still 5ft 6, ginger and a big nose!

Reporter: Where will Marion Pahars fit into the team line-up?
Strachan: Not telling you! It's a secret.

Reporter: There goes your unbeaten run. Can you take it?
Strachan: No, I'm just going to crumble like a wreck. I'll go home, become
an alcoholic and maybe jump off a bridge.

Reporter: There's no negative vibes or negative feelings here?
Strachan: Apart from yourself, we're all quite positive round here. I'm
going to whack you over the head with a big stick, down negative man, down.

Reporter: So, Gordon, in what areas do you think Middlesbrough were better
than you today?
Strachan: What areas? Mainly that big green one out there.

Talking about Wayne Rooney... "It's an incredible rise to stardom.
At 17 you're more likely to get a call from Michael Jackson than Sven Goran
Eriksson."

Reporter: "Gordon, can we have a quick word please?"
Strachan: "Velocity" [walks off]

[Moke]

I once heard this...


Me: Hi James!

J222JRA: Wash Gsdkubdfbnuicvbnicv polish rgiukdnfjgbnsdjhfbvnmcb wax rdfgkhsdfgiuendfgn wash eigdfubdnfgiusdfg rinse.

[Lacey_106]

Seeing as this is taking a football theme:

'I couldn't settle in Italy - it was like living in a foreign country.'
- Ian Rush

'Germany are a very difficult team to play...they had 11 internationals out there today.' - Steve Lomas

'It took a lot of bottle for Tony (Adams) to own up.' - Ian Wright (speaking about TA's addiction to alcohol)

Quote from home:
'Would you like the pizza sliced in 4 or 8?'
'4 please, I couldn't possibly eat 8'

[0rang3peel]

Martin Jol - "Hopefully we can go to Arsenal and keep a clean sheet. But it will be very difficult. Anything can happen at Highbury. Maybe hundreds of squirrels will come on to the pitch and we will have a problem. You cannot prepare for things like that. We will probably have to run from them."

[Liamm]

Quote from home:
'Would you like the pizza sliced in 4 or 8?'
'4 please, I couldn't possibly eat 8'

Thats something my sister would say xD

little sis: " mum i want an ice lolly!"
mum: "get a cornetto"
sis: "noo cause i dont like the cone i only like the etto!"

[Lacey_106]

Thats something my sister would say xD

little sis: " mum i want an ice lolly!"
mum: "get a cornetto"
sis: "noo cause i dont like the cone i only like the etto!"

That was me that said that :( :n:

I love that, she's a genius by the sounds of it. Who needs real words if you can make up your own?!

[Proffitt]

To infinity and beyond

[savo]

Martin Jol - "Hopefully we can go to Arsenal and keep a clean sheet. But it will be very difficult. Anything can happen at Highbury. Maybe hundreds of squirrels will come on to the pitch and we will have a problem. You cannot prepare for things like that. We will probably have to run from them."

Seriously?!?...i think he should be getting a new jacket with nice long sleeves and a new padded bedroom after coming out with that lol.

[0rang3peel]

Seriously?!?...i think he should be getting a new jacket with nice long sleeves and a new padded bedroom after coming out with that lol.

Yeah lol, one of my favourite footie quotes :D

[Proffitt]

There's a snake in my boot

[Pixie]

Man, you gotta warn somebody before you crack one like that. My mouth was open and everything.

[P90PTS]

Capt. Herbert Sobel: [Sobel pulls Liebgott's bayonet out of its sheath and examines it] Rusty bayonet, Liebgott. You wanna kill Germans?
Joseph Liebgott: Yes, sir.
Capt. Herbert Sobel: [Sobel hits Liebgott's helmet with the bayonet] Not with this.
[he walks out in front of the company and holds the bayonet up for every man to see]
Capt. Herbert Sobel: I wouldn't take this rusty piece of shit to war, and I will not take *you* to war in your condition!
[he thrusts the bayonet into the ground]
Capt. Herbert Sobel: Now, thanks to these men and their infractions, every man in the company who had a weekend pass... has lost it.
[pause]
Capt. Herbert Sobel: Change into your PT gear, we're running Currahee.

[Pieface]

Capt. Herbert Sobel: [Sobel pulls Liebgott's bayonet out of its sheath and examines it] Rusty bayonet, Liebgott. You wanna kill Germans?
Joseph Liebgott: Yes, sir.
Capt. Herbert Sobel: [Sobel hits Liebgott's helmet with the bayonet] Not with this.
[he walks out in front of the company and holds the bayonet up for every man to see]
Capt. Herbert Sobel: I wouldn't take this rusty piece of shit to war, and I will not take *you* to war in your condition!
[he thrusts the bayonet into the ground]
Capt. Herbert Sobel: Now, thanks to these men and their infractions, every man in the company who had a weekend pass... has lost it.
[pause]
Capt. Herbert Sobel: Change into your PT gear, we're running Currahee.

Someone needs to stop watching Band of Brothers.

[P90PTS]

I certainly do not.

[MattSaxoVTR]

you never win silver, you just lose gold.
i like this one

[Pixie]

you never win silver, you just lose gold.
i like this one

This is quite catchy :D

[Carlvtr88]

If you know any stupid/thick quotes, put them on here...

Taken from fabio cappello:
"Howcum you lost today fabio, any reasons?"
'I think we lost becuase we didnt win' LMAO!

mmm, and hes in charge of our england internation team. Ridiculous ! Mise well have me in there.

[Carlvtr88]

The one thing about music, When it hits you, You feel no pain ! Bob Marley.

[Toilet_Hugger]

If all else fails ... "Your Mum" :homme:

[0rang3peel]

Didn't realise strachan was an interview legend. I miss Joe Kinnear he was a legend loved it when he got zogs name wrong & called him insommnia LOL

[Bound]

LEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOYYYYY YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY JEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENKINS. s

[Toilet_Hugger]

Ronald Reagan

"Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder"

[0rang3peel]

Ronald Reagan

"Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder"

got here in the end then ;)

[Toilet_Hugger]

got here in the end then ;)

Aye, wth a little help ;)

◦Just because your body has orifices doesn't mean you should put things into them.

[holdawayt]

women are like parking spaces, all the good ones are taken. The rest are disabled!

[LWS_71]

life is like a box of chocolates, all the good ones get eaten and you're left with the crap.

[savo]

A word to the wise ain't necessary...it's the stupid ones that need the advice.

[VTHall]

women are like parking spaces, all the good ones are taken. The rest are disabled!

:p:clapping::clapping:

[Pixie]

women are like parking spaces, all the good ones are taken. The rest are disabled!

I love this one :clapping: but as i'm a woman myself I will tell that as Men are like parking spaces :D

[Moke]

When I grow up, I'm going to be like Britney Spears!!

Bald.

[Carlvtr88]

women are like bowling balls, you can pick them up, slide in 3 fingers, fuck them down an alley. leave them in the gutter and they still come back for more....

[saxo_tom1234]

women only want 1 thing.... everything.


then they change there minds and dont want it anymore

[Lacey_106]

women only want 1 thing.... everything.


then they change there minds and dont want it anymore

AMAZING.
:hug:

[savo]

When you're right, no one remembers. When you're wrong, no one forgets.

[Toilet_Hugger]

When you're right, no one remembers. When you're wrong, no one forgets.

I like that one :y: so true :oops:

[Pixie]

women only want 1 thing.... everything.



Love it :clapping:
So True :D

[Moke]

Jesus may have turned water into wine, but I turned a whole student loan into vodka...

[savo]

Hahahahahaha...good one Mike.

[saxo_tom1234]

Jesus may have turned water into wine, but I turned a whole student loan into vodka...

stolen :)

[savo]

Didn't realise strachan was an interview legend. I miss Joe Kinnear he was a legend loved it when he got zogs name wrong & called him insommnia LOL

Strachan didn't suffer fools gladly to say the least lol.

Just googled joe kinnear...he's fucking mental hahaha had to laugh at this one:


Joe Kinnear: Which one is Simon Bird? [from The Daily Mirror]

SB: Me.

JK: You're a cunt.


haha pmsl

[Mochachino]

"at the end of the day" - Stereotypical Council Estate tenant.

[CHIP]

"at the end of the day" - Stereotypical Council Estate tenant.

It get's dark ;)

[Moke]

stolen :)

Bitch ;)

[craig180]

From Rock n Rolla

There's no school like the old school, and I'm the f**king headmaster!

From Pulp Fiction

English, mother***ker; do you speak it?

And my favourite from an ex gf

Me (late one night):

Shall we pop to the 24 hour garage for some [whatever it was]?

Her:

Will it still be open?

[Lacey_106]

And my favourite from an ex gf

Me (late one night):



Her:

AMAZING...

:y::y::y:

[craig180]

AMAZING...

:y::y::y:

She was a bright girl...

[savo]

She was a bright girl...

It shows lol

[Moke]

She was a bright girl...

Bright blonde?

[Pixie]

Bright blonde?

Or Bright Ginger !

[craig180]

Bright blonde?
Correctamundo. You're my start pupil:D

Or Bright Ginger !
Not quite but I don't mind a bit of orange flange tbh

[Moke]

Correctamundo. You're my start pupil:D

Yes! :D

Do I get to stay after class? :oops:

[craig180]

Yes! :D

Do I get to stay after class? :oops:

For a beating?

[P90PTS]

Lt. Aldo Raine: When you get to your little place on Nantucket Island, I 'magine you're gonna take off that handsome-lookin' S.S. uniform of yours, ain'tcha?... That's what I thought. Now that I can't abide. How 'bout you Utivich, can you abide it?
Pfc. Smithson Utivich: [finishes scalping Herrmann] Not one damn bit, sir.
Lt. Aldo Raine: I mean, if I had my way... you'd wear that goddamn uniform for the rest of your pecker-suckin' life. But I'm aware that ain't practical, I mean at some point you're gonna hafta take it off. So. I'm 'onna give you a little somethin' you can't take off.

[Moke]

For a beating?

No...

We can re-create what happened in detention last week ;)

[Pixie]

No...

We can re-create what happened in detention last week ;)

Your imagination amazes me lol

[craig180]

Your imagination amazes me lol

His lack of infractions amazes me more

[Moke]

Your imagination amazes me lol

My imagination is amazing! :D

His lack of infractions amazes me more

Ooh, you want me to be a bad, bad boy instead?

LMFAO!! :A:

[Pixie]

His lack of infractions amazes me more

I figured he would have a few , I only have one :oops:

[Moke]

I figured he would have a few , I only have one :oops:

Erm, excuse me?! I have one thank you.

[Pixie]

Erm, excuse me?! I have one thank you.

You just have a good way of talking your way out of things :D

[Moke]

You just have a good way of talking your way out of things :D

You knows it ;)

Craig and James love me anyway... Not too sure about Pred lol! :P

[Pixie]

You knows it ;)

Craig and James love me anyway... Not too sure about Pred lol! :P

What's happened to your avatar?!

[Moke]

What's happened to your avatar?!

What do you mean? :S

[Lacey_106]

You knows it ;)

Craig and James love me anyway... Not too sure about Pred lol! :P

No they don't... they hate everyone, they're mods!

[craig180]

No they don't... they hate everyone, they're mods!

We just like to give you that impression ;)

[Pixie]

What do you mean? :S

Its gone :ponder: :panic:

[Moke]

Its gone :ponder: :panic:

No it hasn't? Lol.

Hmm, if it has, I think a certain somebody is playing a joke on me :(

[Lacey_106]

We just like to give you that impression ;)

:D :hug::hug:

I'll post that pic of you and your dog....

I'll get banned though.

[Proffitt]

Erm, excuse me?! I have one thank you.

What for you naughty boy?

[Moke]

What for you naughty boy?

Calling a member on here, who I think isn't a member anymore, a nasty swearword :n:

I have learnt my lesson :A:

[0rang3peel]

Lt. Aldo Raine: When you get to your little place on Nantucket Island, I 'magine you're gonna take off that handsome-lookin' S.S. uniform of yours, ain'tcha?... That's what I thought. Now that I can't abide. How 'bout you Utivich, can you abide it?
Pfc. Smithson Utivich: [finishes scalping Herrmann] Not one damn bit, sir.
Lt. Aldo Raine: I mean, if I had my way... you'd wear that goddamn uniform for the rest of your pecker-suckin' life. But I'm aware that ain't practical, I mean at some point you're gonna hafta take it off. So. I'm 'onna give you a little somethin' you can't take off.

inglorious barstewards, you're loving the war films

[Proffitt]

Tut tut :p

Glad you've learnt your lesson :homme:

I don't have any :D

[Moke]

Tut tut :p

Glad you've learnt your lesson :homme:

I don't have any :D

Would you like one?

[craig180]

:D :hug::hug:

I'll post that pic of you and your dog....

I'll get banned though.

No way to speak of my vbh :D

[Proffitt]

Would you like one?

Nah, im a good boy ;)

[J222JRA]

No they don't... they hate everyone, they're mods!

I dont hate everyone.......just 90% of members.

Mike is included in the 90%.

[Lacey_106]

No way to speak of my vbh :D

:shocked:

But VBH is my bitch?


Infraction for Craig for getting this thread off topic tbh...

On topic:

Why did God create men? Because vibrators can't mow the lawn.
-- Madonna Dangerous Game (1993)

[Moke]

Nah, im a good boy ;)

:A:

I dont hate everyone.......just 90% of members.

Mike is included in the 90%.

I don't care.

Why?! Oh my God, Why?! *Commits suicide*

[saxo_tom1234]

its not rape if you shout suprise

[Moke]

I once went to Portugal to find myself a girl. It was great, I came back with one and didn't have to pay for her flight... She fit perfectly into my suitcase.

[savo]

Always remember that you are absolutely unique...just like everyone else.

[Mochachino]

Always remember that you are absolutely unique...just like everyone else.

haha i lolled