Are you married, if so, why?

[D4MJT]

As above really :y:

[chompy]

Yes and for a bit of stability.

[L33h]

Im not and i dont think ill ever get married

[Ross]

I like the stability and confidence of a marriage. Shows the world we're together "for ever" and I think it means you fight harder to make the relationship work. I have old-fashioned values so believe in the values of marriage etc.

[Kebabman]

I like the stability and confidence of a marriage. Shows the world we're together "for ever" and I think it means you fight harder to make the relationship work. I have old-fashioned values so believe in the values of marriage etc.

This. Although not married at present we will be some day for sure. All a matter of timing and money etc.

[Mickswan]

Will be ten weeks this Saturday. Been with her a while, nothing will change, we already live together etc etc. It's only fair as she put up with me not being around that much when I was in the army.

[Quick]

Better tax code¬

[matt_vtr_15a]

You considering it?

My mum and dad have been together since they were 15, 35+ years have passed and they are still happily together and not married.

To them marriage was no more than a piece of paper. Both of their parents married, divorced and re-married further down the line.

As they were together whilst their parents were going thru a divorce they basically decided from early on that they would never get married.

My mum has basically already said she doesn't expect me to ever be married or have children, whereas with my sister she is encouraging her to not settle down too soon by feeling pressured.

Everyone is different, have to do what works as a couple. I'll never get married though.

[Mickswan]

I'd be happy as is but she wants to and I'm not arsed. Basically she puts up with my shit so she can have this one.

[deano_123]

She told me to

[Gabbastard]

Dont see the point, and Im not religious in any way either. Plus I dont think it actually means anything anymore. Married and dont like it? Get a divorce.

[Giraffe]

Dont see the point, and Im not religious in any way either. Plus I dont think it actually means anything anymore. Married and dont like it? Get a divorce.

Exactly this.

[D4MJT]

Some interesting replies. Alpha Matt, past considering, I'm getting married in August lol.

For me, my folks were married and are still together, 27th wedding anniversary this year just gone, so I guess I have some of the traditional values of it, however that isn't personally why I'm getting married.

I've been with my partner Sarah for 7 years now, we've known each other since we were 14 at Scouts, and we're pretty much best mates as stated, I trust her totally.

She also works in the care sector, dealing specifically with people with life changing injuries, usually brain injuries, and caring for them. To that end, and with a few other stories, it's the legal side of marriage I'm most interested in.

Having been together for the length of time we have, we both know what each would want in a 'worst case' scenario, but there are others as well. I know of a couple who have lived together for 15 years, but never got married.

He unfortunately was involved in a motorcycle accident and was killed, she was left with their child. Due to them not being married, she was not the legal next of kin, his parents were. They obviously wanted her to stay on in his house, and were supportive etc, but 3 years down the line, they were elderly, and didn't want her to start dating again or bring anyone back to their sons house.

A difficult situation, and although one that was eventually resolved, I don't want Sarah to have to wrangle with anything if I check out prematurely. Similarly, her family are fucking mental, god knows where she came from, but I definitely don't want them having any say should the worst happen.

Although that all sounds very morbid, it's something I started to think about as I got older, so that's pretty much the big benefit to marriage that I can see, being able to put your chosen partner in control over what happens if you can't make the decisions.

[sje00]

I personally have no reason for marriage other than the gf wants to one day. I don't need to be married to show people were in love. Infact I don't need to show then at all. It's how we make each other feel. And I could happily live without marriage, but I will do it because she wants to and it will make her happy.

Nowadays the reasons for marriage have been abused and do not have the meanings they used to.

[devilsadvocate]

I am 27 and in no rush to get married.

The plan is to move in with Jemma and then look to get married. Have to make sure I can live with her before getting married!

Personally I think the order should be:

Move in
Marriage
Kids

Several of her friends are married and spent all their savings on the wedding....now they all rent and cannot afford to save for a deposit for a mortgage. Surely a backwards way of doing it?

Kids should always come last as they are something which will prevent you cutting all ties should it not work out. You can sell the house and get a divorce but the kids will be there to stay!!!

[Brettles1986]

Only been with the Mrs for 9 months.

I will be honest though, we both have really similar interests and get on really well. I can honestly say that of the girls I have been with I enjoy spending time with her and we have been living together for 6 of the 9 months already.

It's the first time I have been in a relationship where my opinion is really taken into consideration all the time.

This one is a keeper and I anticipate getting married to her around the 2 year mark.

[D4MJT]

Several of her friends are married and spent all their savings on the wedding....now they all rent and cannot afford to save for a deposit for a mortgage. Surely a backwards way of doing it?


Fuck that. People spend an insane amount of money on weddings, it's utterly bizarre. I'd been heartbroken if I woke up the next day and I'd spend 10 grand on a party for extended family I didn't really like.

[Mickswan]

Me and the Mrs have only spent £2,000 on the wedding. We didn't cheap out, but we were sensible. Day do is at a local restaurant and the night time do at the local social club. Pointless spending fortunes on a venue for one night and everyone will be pissed they won't care. A lad I worked with spent £15k, I just see that as a good chunk of a mortgage or a car.

As for cars, I remember as a kid at my uncles wedding he drove off in his Sirocco with beer cans tied to the back. So the saxos getting that treatment.

[Giraffe]

Me and the Mrs have only spent £2,000 on the wedding. We didn't cheap out, but we were sensible. Day do is at a local restaurant and the night time do at the local social club. Pointless spending fortunes on a venue for one night and everyone will be pissed they won't care. A lad I worked with spent £15k, I just see that as a good chunk of a mortgage or a car.

As for cars, I remember as a kid at my uncles wedding he drove off in his Sirocco with beer cans tied to the back. So the saxos getting that treatment.

I have a mate who has paid £35k just for exclusive use of his venue for his marriage, and I'm pretty sure there are other costs like cars, suits, honeymoon etc on top of that. I actually can't fucking believe it, so much so that I don't really want to be involved any more because it's just ridiculous.

[Jamie]

You do not have to get married to show you love someone, obviously it's down to the individuals. You both know how you feel about eachother but marriage is just another way of expressing it to the masses and of course showing you are proud to be with that person. So proud that you want them to bare your family name *if you are a guy*. Making her technically family is a good way to show her that she has stability. It could be seen in a more detached sense as an insurance policy lol.

My uncle spent over 100k on his wedding, it was exquisite. It was at the Savoy, London. Before that we were at a truly beautiful Greek Orthadox church called 'St Sophia's Cathedral' in London. I'll probably not get another day like that in my life., I certainly wouldn't be willing. That said, I suppose if you can spunk that sort of money you'd do it.

Me myself, if I marry it will be in a secluded country church - assuming I can get married in any church if I'm Greek orthodox. Then a nice country venue with a classy touch. Then off for a trip of a lifetime.

[Brettles1986]

My mrs taking my family name is not a major one for me.

My surname is England and hers is English.

[0rang3peel]

My mrs taking my family name is not a major one for me.

My surname is England and hers is English.

You are probably far off cousins :ill:

[D4MJT]

My mrs taking my family name is not a major one for me.

My surname is England and hers is English.

Good surname! :y:

[Brettles1986]

You are probably far off cousins :ill:

We are very far off cousins you are correct :P

Good surname! :y:

Albeit very ironic.