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View Full Version : Proud to be british.


Smithy2003
27th January 2004, 07:20
Found this....thought you might like some useless facts.
BE VERY PROUD TO BE BRITISH BECAUSE...

Only in Britain... can a pizza get
to your house faster than an ambulance.
Only in Britain... do supermarkets make sick people walk
all the way to the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while
healthy!!! people can buy cigarettes at the front.
Only in Britain... do people order double cheeseburgers,
large fries, and a DIET coke.

Only in Britain... do banks leave both doors open and chain
the pens to the counters.
Only in Britain... do we leave cars worth thousands of
pounds on the drive and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the
garage.
Only in Britain... do we use answering machines to screen
calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone
we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

Only in Britain... are there disabled parking places in
front of a skating rink.

NOT TO MENTION...

3 Brits die each year testing if a 9v battery works on
their tongue.

142 Brits were injured in 1999 by not removing all pins
from new shirts.

58 Brits are injured each year by using sharp knives
instead of screwdrivers.

31 Brits have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas
tree while the fairy lights were plugged in.

19 Brits have died in the last 3 years believing that
Christmas decorations were chocolate.

British Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after
cracker pulling accidents.

101 people since 1999 have had broken parts of plastic toys
pulled out of the soles of their feet

18 Brits had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper
with a lit cigarette in their mouth.

A massive 543 Brits were admitted to A&E in the last two
years after opening bottles of beer with their teeth.

5 Brits were injured last year in accidents involving out
of control Scalextric cars.

And finally.........

In 2000 eight Brits cracked their skull whilst throwing up
the Toilet............................

RULE BRITANNIA!

Scott
27th January 2004, 07:27
LMFBO! © sax-p!

Simo
27th January 2004, 07:33
Cool... some really useless shit there smileys/smiley17.gif

Always a good read though! smileys/smiley14.gif

Chris
27th January 2004, 14:30
LMBO! © sax-p.... smileys/smiley4.gifsmileys/smiley4.gif

saxxxo
27th January 2004, 15:35
Some good stats there. I'll have to use them at the next work night down the pub smileys/smiley23.gif

samholt
27th January 2004, 15:36
lol....I wonder how much of that is true!!!

saxxxo
27th January 2004, 15:48
I think some of them could be true

''142 Brits were injured in 1999 by not removing all pins
from new shirts''

I've done that myself

kazbid
28th January 2004, 06:12
very good. think u shud all take note of the 543 peeps opening bottles of beer with there teeth tho. a lot of them seem real enuf to be tru

Simo
28th January 2004, 06:29
Yeah, a few of them sound quite "british" too smileys/smiley5.gif

Funny... ;)

tgazvtr
28th January 2004, 12:45
LMBO! © sax-p but when you think about it it is all true. smileys/smiley17.gif

Raysax
28th January 2004, 13:22
Hahahahahaha, there gud n theyve cheered me up on this miserable cold mornin.. smileys/smiley17.gif

A4RDN
28th January 2004, 14:53
i like the x-mas cracker one

Deano1983
28th January 2004, 15:25
That waterin the xmas tree wen the lights r plugin is a gud en!!

A4RDN
28th January 2004, 15:35
yer that made me laugh aswel,the serious burns while puttin a jumper of was funny

barrett
28th January 2004, 20:17
yeah the jumper one was funny

Smithy2003
29th January 2004, 02:40
Your all easily amused aren't you?
smileys/smiley4.gif

D@v1
29th January 2004, 02:44
The injury by scalextric cars is the best though!

barrett
29th January 2004, 03:59
yeah but saying that one hit me in the face when i was fucking around with my set the other day. It sure hurts more than u would expect!!!

D@v1
29th January 2004, 04:25
teaches you to be laying down on the floor playing with it! should stand back and play with it at a safe distant lol smileys/smiley4.gif

Smithy2003
29th January 2004, 05:39
Only in Britain... do people order double cheeseburgers,
large fries, and a DIET coke.
My mates gf does that.

Only in Britain... do we leave cars worth thousands of
pounds on the drive and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the
garage.
There is so much junk in the garage that would be better off in a skip my parents can't get their car in the garage.

58 Brits are injured each year by using sharp knives
instead of screwdrivers.
I found myself doing that the other day. Penknife upstairs or do i go downstairs to get a screwdriver.....sod it, penknife.

A massive 543 Brits were admitted to A&E in the last two
years after opening bottles of beer with their teeth.
And my nephew does that.

Rule Britania indeed!!